java.lang.CloneNotSupportedException - You are a clone. Find the original you, tell him what you want to do and then kill yourself.
java.lang.IndexOutOfBoundsException - You have put your index finger in an unacceptable place. Reposition it and try again.
java.lang.NoSuchFieldException - You are trying to have a picknick on a field that does not exist. You can also get this exception if you try to visit an airfield that in fact does exist, but has been classified as top-secret. I'd give you examples, but then I'd have to kill you.
java.lang.NullPointerException - You do not own a dog. Get one, for example a brittany spaniel, and try again.
java.awt.color.CMMException - Your CMM is broken. What ever the hell that is. I usually burn my house down and move to a new city to start over.
java.net.BindException - Java programming and bondage don't mix.